durians

durians are naturally sharp and thorny, cf. a coconut, which has a thick, hard but ultimately smooth and unassuming husk. now the reason both are so could conceivably be because of some necessity to protect what is seated within. think about it, when somebody says hmmm durian, you tend not to think of the green, poky stuff, but rather the yellow, soft stuff. hmmm durian. SEE?! no? really no? bluffer.

anyhoo, on a side note, only two jungle animals get to discover the secrets of the durian every now and then. the tiger, with nature's approval in the form of brute strength, and the monkey, with God's blessing in the form of tool mastery. something tells me the monkey appreciates a good durian way more than the tiger does.

a durian is so mysterious. you always know somethings going on because you can smell it, but try to sniff it out too closely and you get poked in the fase. plus, you never know if its the sweet kind or the bitter kind or the bittersweet kind. or just plain rotten inside. whatever it is, you wont know until you get past that green carapace of cutters. or more accurately, you dont get to know most of the time. thats the point. (ohhhhh Lord forgive me the cheap pun i deserve to be punished!)

why are durians like that? its prolly intentional. the spikes scream get the fuck away from me bitch, which seems like a reasonable thing to say considering being eaten is highly unlikely to be an enjoyable affair; this of course, coming from the perspective of a normal human being (i, on the other hand might actually enjoy it. whoops topic for a different post).. but the whole concept also sings irony because why would durians not want to be eaten when they taste so damn good? and i suspect they know it! what kind of sick game are they playing? stupid paraduxrian so annoying! i want to box one but i cant!!!

someone asked me last year what would i want to eat for the last time just before i die. yup, same answer this year. im so consistent. somebody give me a medal.

durians are available most of the time, but good durians only come along once in awhile. one thing about durians is that after having some, your breath, burp, fart and pee all smell like durian. cool huh. holy shit, is this blog weird or what?

not as weird as durians!