cogito, ergo amo

Love Part Quatre

i tried thinking about it a month ago but could only come up with what i felt then was suffice to conclude those thoughts. either i subconsciously misled myself into a cheap and convenient ending or i simply arrived at a suspect deduction put forth with insufficient proof of depth. i am loath to admit either but i would much rather be a bad persuader than a delusional psychopath. forty five minutes on the bus and another two hours alone in my head, james-san. i think, therefore i love. let me now produce the workings of a thought...

and tell you about the hypothetical:

someone who tries to smile when they are sad and dares to frown when they are happy, looking good either way, looking good even without trying, someone who has empathy, someone who lives upon structure and sees the merit of law, someone who respects ethics and practices morality, someone who will fight tooth and nail for those values, someone who will fight tooth and nail for their friends' dignities. someone neither driven nor aimless, nor filial nor rebellious. someone who isnt lazy, someone who speaks without thinking, someone who gives but refuses to take, someone who is generous with their heart, someone who loves everyone and still has more of it to love every animal. someone who is reliable, and predictable, someone who is hot because they are warm, someone who likes being liked, someone who isnt happy until everyone else is happy, someone who is sad when everyone else is sad, someone who doesnt steal anything but the hearts of the people around them,

someone who has all that i do not have. but then you already arrived at this conclusion 10 years ago when your teacher asked you this question. what does this mean? it means you are smarter than m it means your primary school is better than my primary school...

such is not the end to this intellectual escapade; i believe there are many who can tick all the boxes, but rare is that someone who is not only everything that i am not, but also who knows that, and above that accepts me in spite of, despite of and because of knowing who i am not--therefore truly knowing who i am; therefore truly accepting who i am.

ergo the right one for me is the one for whom i am right. QED.

(bet your teacher wouldnt have said you were wrong if youd just told her that instead. or maybe she wouldve slapped you. funny either way.)