when is the best time to use vulgarities?

well let me show you a few examples in which it's the right time to say some nasty stuff.

"What the fuck was that?" - Mayor Of Hiroshima, 1945

"Where did all those fucking Indians come from?" - Custer, 1877

"Any fucking idiot could understand that." - Einstein, 1938

"It does so fucking look like her!" - Pablo Picasso, 1926

"How the fuck did you work that out?" - Pythagoras, 126 BC

"You want WHAT on the fucking ceiling?" - Michelangelo, 1566

"Where the fuck are we?" - Amelia Earhart, 1937

"Scattered fucking showers, my ass!" - Noah, 4314 BC

"Aw c'mon. Who the fuck is going to find out?" - Bill Clinton, 1999

"He fucking tried to kill my daddy!" - George W. Bush, 2002

"Where are the fucking WMDs?!" - UN, 2003

"Oh, fuck." - Saddam Hussein, 2003

"Geez, I didn't think they'd get this fucking mad." - Osama bin Laden, 2001

yes, indeed 'fuck' is about the most versatile word in the English language. it is by its own worth a noun, pronoun, verb, adverb, adjective, clause, subject etc. it survives in any context, with or without oxygen.

right. although one of the favourites in my arsenal of gentle expletives, "fuck" still does not top "cheebye" (or "chibai", "cibai"... as socially inferior classes spell it) as the most special word in my special box of vocabs. there is a unique aura that surrounds this word. it just sounds powerful when you say it. CHEEBYE. a slow ch- intonation followed by a very abrupt and 'fuck-you-in-the-face' BYE resonance. the fact that it is not as adulterated as the word 'fuck' has only increased the emotional and aural value of 'cheebye'. the word should therefore be used sparingly and not so fucking freely as the average vulgarity in order to preserve its value.

when you are running in the house and accidentally ram a toe into the teak furniture, thats a greenlight. CHEEEEEBYE.

or if you close a door and dimwittedly leave a pinky in the hinges. FUCK LA CHEEEBYE.
length of the CHEEEEEE reverbation can be modulated according to the level of fucked-up'ness of the situation.

remember kids, dont overuse it, or we will end up with another very useful but meaningless word such as 'fuck'. the cheebye is precious. treasure it. caress it. dream of it. worship the cheebye, but dont overexert it.

and selamat hari raya to our muslim friends. yay. ya and cheers to our indian buddies too.

im going to the Cheers outlet for a beer or two. goodnight.

free at last

exams are over. after worrying about being hopeless during the paper, we can now start worrying about retaining. chem was ok, physics wasnt and math was OMGWTFBBQ k thx. still, i used 4 slices of paper so thats an improvement right there.

but since the papers are done, we are free at last, to do silly things like plotting a graph on pullups. this is a real plotting btw, which marks my progress in pullups. doing many pullups allows one to do more pullups. that is rather useful in life. press to enlarge. (also works on many other things beside thumbnails.)



man what a beautiful graph. by plotting t against x we get a misbehaving curve-like straight line thingamajig. therefore something must be valid. note that the best-fit line spears near the origin. yea careful calculation of scale interval to achieve such scientific perplexity.

gradient g is found by (268-92)/(26-9)=10.3529, with which we can place into the equation of choice, y=gx+k. constant k is computed to be y-gx, 92-(10.3529*9)=-1.17.

the equation of this mojo-jojo line is thus sagaciously formulated to be y=10.3529x - 1.1765

zero t is 10th January. my funky graph tells me that i will achieve 33.8 pullups by Christmas, ~38 pullups by Chinese New Year and 44.8 pullups when i turn 18 in April, on which day i will drink beer and make merry but thats another story. turns out i can hit 50 pullups during NAPFA. the assumption is that the gradient will remain as x increases. probably true since daily training requires me to complete 2x; power output and difficulty increase proportionally, so time over difficulty is an expected constant.

experiment is continuously carried out in a draft-free experiment because i have naugt intention to draw a graph of me oscillating under a pullup bar. there are no anomalous points. the big bump in the beginning of the line is really not there. your eye is probably anomalous. i suggest stabbing it with a meter rule or concentrating like a retard on a spirit level to reduce the systematic error there.

LEVEL 8 TYVM.

i have never seen such an abominable physics paper in my life.

i have never seen such a simple chemistry paper in my life.

OCT 13 Update: seeing is believing.

is it time to mug yet?

ps 24 nov 2009: i havent been studying for a long time. and lately ive also come to realise why i hate books so much. they make me feel lonely like i never do when im not reading. i hit the study notes and after 4 hours i go into a deep state in which i become aware that i dont really have much to speak of except my thoughts such as this. and i dont like this kind depression, the irrational kind. and so i owe alot to clarence who around this time four years ago was there, unknowingly blocking out this shadow that creeps up behind me whenever i study alone. my greatest fear is that this philosophy of mine which i built over the last 3 years is fundamentally a lie.

i have never clocked up so much study time in a week than i have my entire jc life. ok my entire life.

roughly 5 hours a day for 5 days, not including the weekend stay at clarence's. his dog can drivel more than me but i digress. since i started taking add maths in 2003 there was never a test i didnt flunk out. i couldnt find the second derivative of my ass if my life depended on it. binomial wha? lnx? how do you pronounce that anyway? they also have all these cool names like Radian, Arctangent, Cosecant² and MacLaurin. if i get an A for C Math, i could impress people with my pro skills. chicken chop at tpjc costs $0.0383radian. omg radiandollars. i should make my own currency when i take over singapore but i digress.

so anyway now i know what mathematical induction is all about. the purpose and relevance of it in my quest for world domination, i find slightly to be more obscure. if i could scrape by with an E, that would place me nicely in line for a AO pass in C Math. (promo takes a 0.9 weightage for grades, midyear's takes 0.1. factoring the result that i got a score of roughly lg 70 for a 70-mark paper, i essentially have zero marks for the midyear component. go figure. )

tomorrow is gp and physics paper2. paper 2 before paper 1, which comes friday. what nonsense. what are they feeding teachers nowadays? i heard Pedigree© helps them grow nice soft fur but that's just silly. and whats this shit about everyone saying that they're 'mugging' for promos. if i hear 'mug' one more time im going to throw a mug full of puke at them. 'mug' has no meaning even remotely close to what ultra-studying is all about. a more appropriate term would be piaing. pia is such a powerful word. find me a another three letter word with as much oomph as pia. and stop thinking about sex. promos is tomorrow.